Quiet

Quiet.  Not exactly the paramount adjective to describe the likes of me.
Nope.  I'm fairly certain I was born talking.  Or at the very least, born-to-talk.

It wouldn't surprise me one bit to hear my own mother announce that my perpetual chatter commenced on the very day of my birth.  If that were indeed the case, it was likely simply because I felt it my duty to share my very own version of the birthing experience.  You know, just to make certain my mom got the story straight on January 23, 1958.

From as far back as I can personally recollect, my inclination has been to fast-forward my speech to intelligible statements and crystal clear points.  Intelligible and clear at least to me, and yes - lots of 'em.

Intelligible and crystal clear.  Apparently then, politics are out of the question.  That's okay.  I've never been accused of being politically correct anyway.  In all likelihood, I'll not have an episode of burning desire to enter that shady arena.

Speaking politically incorrectly then I suppose, I have a few intelligible statements and crystal clear points to share.

I believe ...

• Our Country should remain 'One Nation Under God.'  God alone.
• There should be no religions.  Only devoted relationships with Jesus Christ.  Though I religiously attend a Baptist church, I have no religion.  Only a Savior.
• Abortion should be illegal.  It is not a woman's right to end the life of her child.  Life, on the other hand, is the child's inalienable right.
• The Ten Commandments are 'commandments'.  They're not suggestions.
• An eye for an eye.  It's Biblical.
• Everyone has inner struggles.  If your own inner struggles cause separation from God's will, pray for God's forgiveness, mercy and grace.  He is faithful and just to cleanse you from all unrighteousness.  I know - been on the unrighteousness side of the fence too many times.
• Islam is not a religion.  Islam is a cult.  There's a difference.  Research it.
• Coexist?  No thanks!  C  = Islam.  I = Wicca.  S = Taoism.  Nope.  Won't be buying that bumper sticker.  The symbols are intended to identify a plurality of religious beliefs.  The word itself is intended to encourage religious tolerance.  (See my second bullet-point ... There should be no religions ... Only devoted relationships with Jesus Christ.)

"One Lord, one faith, one baptism; One God and Father of all, who is over all and through all and in all." - Ephesians 4: 5-6

"Beware of false prophets, who come to you in sheep's clothing, but inwardly they are ravenous wolves." - Matthew 7: 15

"Thus you shall not show pity:  Life for life, eye for eye, tooth for tooth, hand for hand, foot for foot." - Deuteronomy 19: 21

"Do you not know that friendship with the world is enmity with God?  Whoever therefore wants to be a friend of the world makes himself an enemy of God." - James 4: 4

"The fear of the Lord is the beginning of knowledge, but fools despise wisdom and instruction." - Proverbs 1: 7

"Before I formed you in the womb, I knew you." - Jeremiah 1: 5

"You shall not follow a crowd to do evil." - Exodus 23: 2

"Open your mouth for the speechless, in the cause of all who are appointed to die." - Proverbs 31: 8

"For you formed my inward parts; you covered me in my mother's womb.  I will praise you for I am fearfully and wonderfully made.  Marvelous are your works.  And, that my soul knows very well." - Proverbs 139: 13-14

My speech. 

My freedom. 

Praying those are never taken from me.

Not-So-Easy Street

Teenagers don't live on Easy Street.

Most commonly their place of residence is on Confusion Boulevard, with opposing lanes of traffic on either side of the greener grass lining the middle of the road.

And though the greener grass would appear to be just footsteps away, it seems to require walking miles upon miles in teenage shoes in order to reach the lush contentment that the greenery affords.

Confusion reigns within the soul that houses the teenager.

Though some teens might turn on the false air of confidence that seems to radiate dignity and grace while dealing with raging hormones and body changes (desired or undesired), confusion is king in their land.

The teenager's homeland - his or her soul - is quite often overrun with what may appear to some as pandemonium.

At least, it contains all the ingredients necessary in a recipe for emotional upset.

Some teenagers throw all these ingredients into the mix haphazardly, unmethodically, and without measurement; while other teenagers seem more apt to measure precisely (or thereabout), being a little more certain of the resulting table set before them.

Not me!

I was more prone to being pandemonized by my own soul.

Measure the ingredients of my daily ins, outs, and whereabouts?  Are you kidding me?  I didn't have time for that.

I just threw all my ingredients, which often consisted of chaos and mayhem, into the pot and turned my internal stove on the highest setting.

After all, I was a teenager.

I had things to do, places to go, people to see.  My life was waiting for me.  And not very patiently, I might add.  Or at least, I did not want to wait for it.

Measure?

Nope.  Time was a-wastin'.

It's sad now looking back at a large portion of my teenage years.  Time wasn't wasting away at all.  But, I was pretty good at wasting time.

I didn't realize then what I realize now - that time was my friend.  Time was on my side.

Time should have been the main ingredient in the casserole that I call my life.

But, I just couldn't resist the express way of life.  You know, for the same reason that we have drive-through fast food restaurants.  We want our piece of the pie, and we want it now.

I think I might have wanted the whole pie, or at least a taste of the assortment.

If law enforcement officials were authorized to give teenagers tickets for driving in the fast lane of life, I probably would have had enough citations to cause them to revoke my life license.

But, there is no such law.

So, I just kept driving on that twisted highway which would ultimately lead to my teenage pregnancy and teen motherhood.

In fact, the more I think about it, the more I think maybe my quick trip through adolescence was more like a non-stop flight to adulthood.

It was not round trip.

My ticket took me directly to adulthood and left me there.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Why are teenagers so confused?  Why not?

No, teenagers don't live on Easy Street.

Rather, the winding paths they travel to get to Destination Road can be quite rough and bumpy.

(... taken from Chapter 3:  PREGNANT AT 16 / Lori Ghiata Bowser)

Baby, Its Cold Outside

Brrr.  Its mighty chilly in Asheville's mountains this weekend.

Frrr-eezing.

And, I'm lovin' it.

Matter-of-fact, its the weather my soul cried out for during those dog days of Summer when it seemed I was forever mopping the sweat from my brow ... and, just about every other body part.

In wintry weather at least, I have the option of choosing the degree of warmth my body maintains ...

• sweatshirt ... or, not.
• extra blanket ... or, not.
• crank up the heat ... or, not.
• snuggle with the hubby ... or, not.

... unless I'm hot-flashing.  Unfortunately, there's no option there.

Even if the frigid weather causes ice to form on power lines, increasing the chances of my home's power going out, I have the option of building a cozy fire in the wood stove ... or, not.

Summer's heat doesn't even come close to allowing for comparable option-variety.

I like options!  And, I like to keep them open.

One exception ...

• where I'll spend eternity.

Eternity offers only two options:

1. Heaven
2. Hell

I've chosen option #1.

I'm praying other folks opt to do the same.

I understand the temperature is perfect there.  Unlike option #2.

'Tis the Season

I believe ... Somebody's comin' to town,

I believe ... He knows if I've been naughty or nice.

I believe ... I'm on His list, and He doesn't need to check it twice.

I believe ... He knows if I believe in Him.

I believe ... He has the perfect gift for me.

I believe ... He cares enough to send the very best.

I believe ... He can be anywhere and everywhere at all times.

I believe ... His arrival may be just around the corner.

I believe ... I'm ready.

Are you ready?

Matthew 24: 44 - "So you also must be ready, because Jesus will come at an hour when you do not expect Him."

'Tis the season ... 'Tis always the season.

Jesus is coming ... again. 

Lindsey's Jesus

Lindsey is our precious seven-year-old granddaughter.  She's "Princess" to her mommy and daddy and, in fact, to all of us who love her so much.

Lindsey has Tay Sachs Disease.  If you're unfamiliar with the disease and its process, please scroll down until you reach my two earlier posts about Lindsey - both dated June 21, 2010.

There is no treatment.

There is no cure.

There is no fairness.

This has been a particularly rough week for Lindsey.  The breaths we all take in and out, moment by moment, we seem most often to take for granted.  Such is not the case for Lindsey. 

For Lindsey, breathing is a mighty and exhausting task.

In the case that you're wondering "Where is God in all this?" ...

• He's with Lindsey every minute of every day.
• He has his loving arms wrapped tightly around her precious body, around the clock.
• He's with her Mommy and Daddy, giving them guidance, comfort, and reassurance of the hope we all have in Jesus.
• He's with her Gramma (me) and Papa Joe (Lindsey gave her Grampa that name), comforting us as well.
• He's continually walking side by side with all of us who love Lindsey so much.  He never leaves.  Thank God.
• He's touching hearts because Lindsey's story is so powerful.
• He's allowing others to observe His mightiness through the undying love and care provided to Lindsey by her Mommy and Daddy every minute of every day.
• He's caused others to reach out to us, wrap their own loving arms around us, and to make God's presence so real, so wonderful, so perfect.  I am so glad to be a part of the family of God.
• He's strengthening hearts like nothing we've ever before experienced.
• He's causing us to lean on Him more and more each day.
• He's allowing us to share Lindsey's story with others, and bring Glory to Jesus' name through it all.
• He has a purpose in everything He allows, even though we might not have a clue regarding that purpose right now.  But, I know His purpose will be revealed in His perfect timing.

That all being said, I am choosing to trust in the Lord with all my heart, and lean not on my own understanding.  In all my ways, I will acknowledge Him. ... see Proverbs 3: 5-6.

The Fashion Plate - Not!

I'm quite comfortable with the skin I'm in.  So, I don't feel any particular peer pressure to spice up my wardrobe.

So fixated am I on my uniform of choice:  t-shirts, blue jeans, and bare feet (as discussed in my recent blog), that I'm doubtful anyone has ever mistaken my identity with that of a fashion magazine super model.

Nope.  I'll be the first to admit that I am not at all the fashion plate.

My kids, in fact, get quite a kick out of rummaging through my clothes closet only to find a lot of boredom hanging (no pun intended) around in there.  My t-shirts, for example.  All the same style, just displayed in a rainbow of colors.

I lack any variety when it comes down to my footwear as well.  Same styles.  Different colors.  Most are patent leather.  And, lots of 'em.  I can't help myself.  Its a "girl-thing."  Even though I prefer sportin' my bare naked feet, and bright pink toenails.

Same old story with my socks and underwear.  Plentiful and colorful, though not of the leather variety.

My blue jeans?  All bought at the same place, at the same time, and off the same designer's rack.  Hey!  I recognize a good deal when I see one.

My kids have even been known to introduce their friends to my bedroom closet, and indulge in a bit (or a lot) of insuppressible laughter at my fashion sense (or nonsense).  Apparently, they're easily entertained.

Joe (my husband) doesn't even waste his precious time anymore inquiring what I'm going to wear on a particular day.  He already knows.  He just doesn't know what color.  A girl's gotta keep some things a mystery.

I'm not really a cheapskate.  Well maybe I am, though I prefer to think that I'm a woman "adorning myself in modest apparel, with propriety and moderation ... not with gold or pearls or costly clothing." - 1 Timothy 2: 9

Yeah ... that's it.  I'll go with that one.

T-Shirts, Blue Jeans, and Bare Feet

Few days lately have been more relaxing to me than this very afternoon, while I rest quietly in the shade on my front porch in my really-needs-to-be-painted rocking chair (I'll get to it later); sporting my fits-just-right t-shirt, my really-loose-fitting blue jeans with ragged-bottom-edges, and my bare-naked feet (except for the bright pink toe-nail polish).

It doesn't bother me in the least that the nothing-compares-with-it North Carolina fall breezes are insistent upon turning the crisp pages of my just-purchased book about Christmas and second chances before I'm even close to prepared to read what happens next.

And every once in a while, when I least expect it, I realize its taken me a too-long period of time to devour just a very few pages of my book simply because my dog-tired eyes have softly closed, apparently unbeknownst to me.  That is, until the fall breezes make the unanimous decision to turn yet another page, or ten, of my book - startling me contentedly back into the comforts of my own home.

Comfortable.  An accurately concise description of the depths-of-my-soul feelings on this not-a-cloud-in-the-sky afternoon in October.

Lunch?  Washing down some cashews and m&m's with a diet coke (yes - diet!) sounds reasonably nutritious.  Certainly satisfying, anyway.

It seems I've waited a near-eternity for these days when there's nothing too awfully pressing that requires my immediate and undivided attention.

On the other hand ... where in the world did the years go?  Wasn't I just eight years old yesterday, playing with Barbie dolls in the back yard of our Michigan home?

I fondly recall - as clearly as if it happened only yesterday - a summer's day in 1966 when, after having played hard all day with the neighborhood kids (there were lots 'n lots of 'em ... remember, I'm a baby-boomer), I told my mom, "I want to stay eight years old forever."  And I meant it.

As a matter of fact, even now whenever I find myself in the company of an eight year old child, I like to tell them, "Eight years old was my all-time-favorite age ever."  I had the time of my life when I was eight, and not a care in the world.

Fast forward ...

I'm going to be fifty-three years old in January.  Fifty-three!  It doesn't seem that long ago that I was under the impression that people who made it to the ripe-old-age of fifty-three were lucky to be alive.

Hey!  I am lucky.

And, as luck would have it, today I happened upon some thoughts which belonged to my dear Grandma Ghiata (who lives in Heaven now with Jesus). 

"Happened upon some thoughts?"  Yes!  These particular thoughts she wrote down.  My Dad shared them with me some years ago.  I read them, then tucked them away in a folder in a filing cabinet - for safe keeping.  I "happened upon" them again today, and I'd like to share them. 

                                          ~   ~   ~   ~   ~   ~

Here - in part - is my Grandma's long-ago-written letter to her friends and neighbors in her hometown of Spruce, Michigan.

In Grandma Gunda Anderson Ghiata's own words:

"Its later than you think.  This is a saying that has given me much thought of late, and as we know, we shall all come to the end of our journey here sooner or later, and it may be sooner than we think."

"I would like to take the opportunity to tell you the reason of the hope that is in me.  I do feel that the majority of my friends believe that I have only joined another church or sect and left the faith of my upbringing, which is not so.  I was brought up in one of the best religions one can find anywhere, and if religion is all that is necessary to take one to Heaven, I would still be where I was.  But at the age of 17, I was brought under the sound of the Gospel."

"I have been burdened a great deal as to my responsibility of making more public the faith I have in our Lord Jesus as Savior of my soul."

"I learned through the scriptures that I was an unsaved sinner, though religious.  Romans 3 verse 23 says, 'All have sinned and come short of the glory of God'."

"I was alone at home one afternoon and with a deep longing to know my sins forgiven.  God's Holy Spirit revealed to my soul the work of Christ on the cross which He accomplished for the very purpose of putting away our sins, and eternal life is ours when we put our trust in Him."

"I know I am saved and have eternal life because God's word says, 'He that believeth on the Son hath everlasting life'."

"I have no religion, but a Savior; and am only a sinner saved by the grace of God through faith in the precious blood of Christ."

"May you also (if you are not sure of salvation) see your need of a Savior, and trust in Christ alone for salvation and forgiveness of sins."

"Your Fellow Traveler To Eternity, Gunda Ghiata"

                                          ~   ~   ~   ~   ~   ~

Indeed, this will go down in my own history as having been one of my favorite "t-shirts, blue jeans, and bare feet" days ever. - Lori Ghiata Bowser

A Sight To Behold

Did you happen to drive down Hanes Mall Blvd. in Winston-Salem yesterday?  The sight just west of Stratford Road was similar to sightings in thousands upon thousands of cities across the United States and Canada.

Yesterday - October 3, 2010 - was National Life Chain Sunday.

In our own neck of the woods, some dear friends and I joined nearly 100 other folks in peaceful, prayerful silence ... standing up for the unborn ... holding signs for passers-by to read the messages in our hearts.

Our messages?

• Adoption:  The loving option.
• Life:  The first inalienable right.
• Pray to end abortion.
• Jesus forgives and heals.
• Abortion hurts women.
• Abortion kills children.
• Lord, forgive our nation.

We stood for the unborn.  We stood for the speechless.  And, we stood to restore hope to their mothers.

Not all unborn children are safe in the warm embrace of their mothers' wombs. 

These are the children for whom we stand, speak up, and pray passionately.

While some unborn children will someday meet their mothers face to face, others have their lives deliberately and brutally ended before they're allowed to take their first breath.

Deliberate?  Yes!  Abortion is contemplated and purposeful, thus deliberate.

Brutal?  Yes!  Abortion is brutal destruction of life.  Research it for yourself.  And, if you have the guts - view one for yourself.  You'll need a vomit bag.

Shamefully nauseating!

I'm fully aware that there may be some folks reading this particular blog today who may consider me insensitive.

To the contrary!

I am entirely sensitive to the plight of the unborn ... for those unable to stand up and make their own voices heard.  If by some miracle they were able to speak, I believe their messages would be similar to the messages on our signs yesterday.

Wouldn't that be a sight to behold!

P.S.  HAPPY BIRTHDAY, DANNY!  Danny was born to me 36 years ago today.  I was just 16 years old, unwed, and scared at the time.  But, I believe God blessed me beyond my dreams for my selfless and moral decision for life for Danny.  And, I guarantee ... Danny's glad for my decision as well. 

I love you, Danny.

Storybook Islands & Heaven

Martha's Vineyard, Nantucket, Edgartown:  Storybook-like islands Joe and I visited last week, accompanied by delightful new friends we met on our Holiday Tours trip.

With relative ease, I can envision myself living in Edgartown (my favorite) peacefully contented for the remainder of my life. 

That is, if money grew on trees.

Alas!  Its only a dream.  And, likely a dream that hasn't even a glimmer of a chance of transforming into reality.  But, I'm okay with that - simply because digging up my North Carolina roots and transplanting them in Massachusetts would surely diminish my opportunities for a "grandkid-fix."  Its doubful I'd be successful in convincing my kids to move there just so this gramma can spoil her grandkids - rotten.

And, to my knowledge, my kids and kids-in-law haven't stumbled upon any money trees either. 

Edgartown's cottages are beyond adorably quaint.  If you're on Facebook, check 'em out - I've posted pics.  Our afternoon stroll was surreal, like we were smack dab in the middle of a storybook, as tranquility saturated our entire beings.

And to think strolling along the streets of Heaven is going to be even better. 

Glorious!

Lovingly, I recall years ago listening admiringly as my dear Grandma Ghiata (who now lives in Heaven with Jesus) played her pump organ so beautifully while while singing a favorite old hymn.  The chorus went like this:

Oh, that will be glory for me,
Glory for me.
Glory for me.
When by His grace, I shall look on His face,
That will be glory,
Be glory for me.

Nutritional Therapy

Dieting ... Ugh!  Back at it once again ... for about the gazillionth time.  Well, a gazillion might be a stretch of my own imagination, but there's no denying that dieting is a pastime of which I am intimately familiar.

Of all the years I've ridden the dieting roller coaster, my best guess is that I've lost nearly 500 pounds ... altogether.  No joke!

Out of curiosity, I looked up the definition of "dieting" this morning.  What did I discover?  Get a load of this:

• nutritional therapy
• sustenance

and ...

• abstinence from food
• starvation

What?  Abstaining from food is nutritionally therapeutic?  And starvation sustains you?

I might not be the brightest crayon in the box, but ... again - What?

Nonetheless, I will begin this new day abstaining from food (well at least the three c's ... chocolate, chips, and cookies) and enduring that starved-to-death feeling in an all-out attempt to regain my girlish figure ... for the gazillionth time.

Psalm 107: 9 - "He (God) satisfies the longing soul, and fills the hungry soul with goodness."

Silver Linings

The older I get and with each passing day, I become increasingly aware of the existence of silver linings in my life.

No!  Its not what you're thinking. 

Instead, I'm referring to those thin, silvery, way-too-shiny annoyances that multiply at a too-great speed on my scalp.

Whatever happened to the days when I would spot only one random silver (let's just totally avoid the word gray - ugh!) strand amongst my dark brown hair and simply pluck that baby, leaving no evidence of its having shown up where it didn't belong?

Those days are gone.  Gone for good. 

Why?  Because they are no longer random.  Now, they have friends.  In fact, they're making an abundance of new friends rapidly ... daily.  Not that I have anything against friendship, but c'mon - this is a little over-the-top.  Who needs that many friends? 

Apparently, my head thinks it does.  Its like a party up there!  Silver "friends" showing up here, there, everywhere, and out of the blue.  Word's apparently getting around that the top of my head is where its all "happening."

What's more ... these guys don't even bother to wait for an invitation or to make reservations - for sometime in the far distant future.  Nope.  These irritating party-crashers just show up whenever they feel like it, on a whim even, then take up permanent residency ... without even asking my permission.

Pluck 'em?  No-can-do!  Tried that.  Wasn't a good plan. 

You see, since I've reached the stage of hosting multitudinous silver guests at this too-crowded party on my head, plucking now could potentially lead to LPB ... Lori-Patterned-Baldness.  I'm not that accomodating of a hostess!

Tried coloring the gray (Oops!  I mean, silver).  Turns out, not all my silver guests accept color. 

Discrimation!

On the flip side, Proverbs 16: 31 says - "The silver-haired head is a crown of glory."

A crown!

Hey!  I believe I'm wearing four of those.  Crowns, that is.  Namely:  Lindsey, Audrey, Samuel and Anderson.

Proverbs 17: 6 says - "Grandchildren are the crown of the aged."

Bring on the silver linings!

Speaking Engagement Winners

The Speaking Engagement Winners (from the Care Net Conference in Grapevine, Texas) are:

• Save A Life, dba The Women's Resource Center - Mobile, Alabama
• Human Life Services - York, Pennsylvania
• Crossroads Pregnancy Center - Milledgeville, Georgia

A Spring In My Step

Summer's end is closing in.

Hallelujah!

Those of the menopausal female persuasion can fully identify with my exuberance when it comes to heat relief.  Not much else is more of an annoyance than pesky hot flashes accompanied by a 110 degree heat index.

With open arms and perspiration-free armpits (eau de armpits), I welcome the arrival of Autumn.  At long last, I can enjoy the great outdoors again ... liberated from profuse sweating, nauseating irritability, dripping makeup, and really bad hair days.

I'll have a spring in my step again ... once Fall clocks in.

Winter?  Even better.

Where's my Snuggie?

Out On A Limb

I'm pretty stubborn.

I'm pretty certain I was born that way.

I'm equally certain stubbornness is a trait that refuses to leave its host. 

Consequently, those who love me - and those who don't - can count on my being stubborn.

At least they can say I can be counted on for something!

Going out on a limb is one of the too-many things I'm awfully stubborn about.

Just give me a limb ... any limb ... and, I'll climb out on it.

I'm even okay with being knocked off the limb.  I'll just pick myself up, shake off the dirt, find another limb, and wind up stronger in the end.

Matthew 10: 14 ... "If anyone will not welcome you or listen to your words, shake the dust off your feet ... "

Speaking Up

I've got a pretty big mouth. 

Its not entirely my own fault.  I've got a hearing disability that appears to have been passed down from my mother to her children and grandchildren.  And since I don't hear well, perhaps I talk much louder than what might be socially acceptable.  Perhaps!

But, that's not necessarily a bad thing.  At least I know no one can ever say they didn't hear what I said.  How in the world could they miss it, with a mouth such as mine?

I like to be heard.  (Don't we all?)

Of course, I particularly like it when others respond positively to the words that I try my darndest to choose very carefully.  But, even at those times when positive responses aren't immediately obvious, I'm fairly certain that my verbalizations have the potential to cause others to, at the very least, give my ideas thoughtful consideration.

From time to time though, I feel like a voice in the wilderness. 

I'm not too fond of those times when my voice is lonesome ... when my voice desperately longs for the company of other voices.  That would be music to my ears (via my hearing aids). 

Loneliness envelopes my voice on occasion, and drags it into the wilderness when I'm speaking up for the unborn.  Not always, but occasionally.

Nevertheless, I will passionately continue to open my big mouth wide in a deliberate pursuit to save the precious lives of Jesus' little ones.

Jesus loves His little children.

With purposeful determination to make my actions speak even louder than my words, and my unwavering pledge to be a voice for the unborn - a very loud voice - I'm leaving Saturday for the Care Net Conference in Grapevine, Texas, where I'll be exhibiting for four days and selling my book, "Pregnant at 16."

Thank you, Jesus, for my big mouth.

My Name is Engraved in His Hands.

WHO does this?  And, WHY?

WHO loves me enough to endure this kind of pain?  And, WHY does He love me so much?

JESUS does this.

JESUS does this as an outward expression of His enduring love for me, and to remind me that I am always in His sight and forever on His mind.

JESUS endured this kind of pain so that I wouldn't have to.

JESUS loves me so much because I am His daughter.

I am never out of His sight. 

I am never out of His mind.

(SEE ISAIAH 49:16)

Boys Will Be Boys

Samuel and Anderson ... All boys! ... All the time!

Life just wouldn't be the same without them.

Who else would hide behind the curtains to play peek-a-boo with Gramma?
Who else would slide down the slide head first to impress Gramma?
Who else would climb on top of his toys to show Gramma how brave he is?
Who else would be able to puke on Gramma without upsetting her?
Who else would flip upside-down just to make Gramma laugh?
Who else would dance to silly songs with Gramma?
Who else would listen to Gramma sing silly songs for hours on end?
Who else would snuggle with Gramma for an afternoon nap?

... No one but Gramma's boys !!

One Moment in Time

I remember this one moment in time as if it occurred only yesterday ...

My mom had just picked me up from high school.  As she drove what turned out to be the longest drive home ever from high school, I noticed that she was suspiciously quiet.  I could tell that she was deep in thought, but I had the distinct feeling that she might share those deep thoughts with me.

She kept looking at me with those distinctively special "mom eyes."  You know - the mother's eyes that are so intensely loving, yet so intensely concerned at the same time.

I sensed that she must have something terribly important to tell me.  It quickly became obvious to me that, at any moment, whatever was on her mind would be verbally passed along to me.  She had something to say, something to tell me, but she just wasn't quite sure where to begin.  I thought, "Did somebody Die?"

As we were driving down the road, having already turned onto the quaint, midwestern street where we lived, my mom (who had taken me some days or weeks earlier to the family doctor for a pregnancy test - because moms really do seem to have a kind of sixth sense, especially about their own offspring) decided to just come out and say what I'm sure had been weighing quite heavily on her mind all day so far.

Ever so gently, compassionately, and quietly, but matter-of-factly, she put her precious hand in mine and said, "Lori, you're pregnant."

My heart sank to my stomach.  Then, my stomach made its way up to my throat.

My once rosy cheeks now lacked of any color at all. 

My insuppressible tears flooded my cheeks, drenched my clothes, and sprinkled onto my high school books.

I glanced over at my mom again.

Her "mom eyes" were bigger-than-life filled with the compassion that only a mom can have for her child.  In my case, a child having a child - her baby having a baby.

After swallowing the big lump in my throat (it took several attempts), I quietly asked my mom to "just drive around the block."

I wasn't ready to go into the house yet.

I wasn't ready to go on with the rest of the afternoon.

Quite frankly, I wasn't ready for anything.

And, I sure wasn't ready to be a mommy.  Not me.  Not at sixteen!

(... from my new book:  Pregnant at 16)

Best Friends

I have the very best friends.

I always knew my friends were strong.  I always knew my friends were encouraging.  And, I always knew my friends were a blessing.

I just didn't know HOW strong, HOW encouraging, and HOW much of a blessing.

Whether old friends, new friends, or somewhere in between ... My friends strengthen me with prayers, encourage me with hope, and bless me with love.

Thank you, dear friends.  Because of you ... I am strong, I am encouraged, and I am blessed.  Blessed beyond my dreams.

I love you.

Daydreams

Daydreams can be quite pleasureable pastimes. 

For instance, during my alone time on the road leading to Asheville to visit with our precious granddaughter, Lindsey - our Princess - and her Momma and Daddy, I daydream all the way there and all the way back.

Daydreaming makes the five-hour round trip worth every single minute!

What daydreams do I enjoy so much on those Asheville trips?

• The days when Lindsey's Daddy was her age.
• The days when I was Lindsey's age.
• The days when Lindsey would shout out "Goal!" when she and her Daddy's favorite soccer teams scored.
• The days when Lindsey watched Dora or the Backyardigans while visiting us - her Gramma and Papa Joe.
• The days when Lindsey and our Yorkie, Scrappy would sit on Lindsey's favorite princess chair together and watch cartoons.
• The days of "hide 'n seek" with Lindsey.  Behind the couch was her favorite hiding spot.  Although, one time I found her trying to hide in her overnight bag.  Too cute!
• The day Lindsey thought she was being sneaky by hiding behind the couch, taking her eye patch off, and sticking the eye patch to the back side of the leather couch.  So cute!  So, we left the eye patch right where Lindsey evidently thought was the perfect spot for it ... until we sold the couch ... then, I lovingly framed the precious pink camoflouge eye patch.
• The days of singing silly songs with Lindsey.
• The days of Lindsey's belly-laughs while singing those silly songs.
• The day / the moment when Lindsey decided her Grampa's name was PaPa Joe.
• The days when Lindsey would ride on PaPa Joe's shoulders during their nature-discovering trips in the woods near our home.
• The day Lindsey rode on her PaPa Joe's shoulders the entire day at the zoo.  PaPa Joe's shoulders never got tired, by the way.  Not ever!
• The days when Lindsey and I would walk hand-in-hand through the neighborhood, discussing nothing in particular - but, everything wonderful.
• The days when Lindsey picked flowers from our flower garden to make her Gramma happy.  Smart little girl!  It worked every time!

I treasure every precious daydream.  Dreams that already came true.

An Invitation for God's Presence

When I purposefully chose to give thanks in everything during the past few weeks, God answered with an obvious "Yes!" to my invitation to bless me with His presence. The Bible tells me so. 

"In everything give thanks, for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you."
     - 1 Thessalonians 5: 18

Lately, I've spent a bit of time in quiet introspection regarding every single word in that verse.  But, I've made an even more deliberate decision to focus on the word "in."

I'll paraphrase ...

What God desires of me, is to give Him thanks IN every situation - whether disappointment or excitement, heartbreak or contentment, grief or relief.  IN so doing, I have INvited His presence IN every circumstance.  ("In", not "for.")

That's not at all to say I'm going to do handsprings no matter what comes my way.  But, I know that IN the end, His plan and His timing will prove to be perfect.

Then, I'll do the handsprings!

Audrey's Life Lessons

Its been a teaching/learning kind of weekend. Our 2 year old granddaughter, Audrey is spending a long holiday weekend with us while her momma and daddy are away celebrating their 5th wedding anniversary. 

Audrey learned alot from her Gramma, PaPa Joe and Aunt Shelby this weekend ...

• How to blow bubbles in the neighbor's swimming pool.
• The neighbor's swimming pool is not a toilet.
• Your underarms are tickle territory.
• The church sanctuary is quiet territory.
• If you don't know all the words to a song - make up your own.
• Pizza and ice cream are standard meals at Gramma and PaPa Joe's house.
• It sure does take a long time for baby bird eggs to hatch.
• Ice cream cones just make you feel like singin' and dancin'.

Audrey taught us even more ...

• It feels pretty good to go to bed early.
• It feels pretty good to lay in bed and talk for awhile before starting your day.
• Wake up the ones you love with a smile, a kiss, and heartfelt bear hug.
• Naps are good things ... really, really good things.
• Sometimes its more fun to watch the people at the fireworks, than to watch the fireworks.
• Its perfectly acceptable to wear shiny, black patent leather shoes anytime, anywhere, and with any outfit ... even your swimsuit.
• Sunglasses can be worn 24/7.
• Laugh out loud - alot!
• Grammas and Grampas are pushovers.
• Ice cream cones make you feel like singin' and dancin'.

You're right ... I already knew that last one. 

Bring on the mint chocolate chip!

Learning to Lean on Jesus ... Still.

I have fond memories of getting all dressed up in my Sunday best when I was a little girl, in preparation for worship at the small chapel we attended in Dearborn, Michigan. 

Even now, as I close my dog-tired eyes in quiet reminiscence, I can still hear the glorious sound of the chapel's sanctuary being filled with the precious voices of dear, devoted Christians harmonizing while proclaiming that they were learning to lean on Jesus.

Are you familiar with the song?

     Learning to lean.
     Learning to lean.
     I'm learning to lean on Jesus.
     Finding more power than I'd ever dreamed,
     I'm learning to lean on Jesus.

     The joy I can't explain fills my heart,
     Since the day I made Jesus my King;
     His blessed Holy Spirit is leading my way,
     He's teaching and I'm learning to lean.

     There's glorious victory each day now for me,
     Since I found His peace so serene;
     He helps me with each task, if only I'll ask,
     Every day now, I'm learning to lean.

I'm STILL learning.

Prayers for Lindsey

We are so thankful for all the prayers that have gone up for Lindsey since her diagnosis of Tay Sachs Disease several years ago, and especially now since her recent admission to the Pediatric Intensive Care Unit at Mission Hospital in Asheville, North Carolina.

I talked to her Daddy (Dan) tonight, and he reports that though Lindsey's condition is still critical, she is stable.  Her temperature is back to normal.  And, the medical providers have decided to try to wean her from the ventilator.  We pray that the weaning is successful, and that she is able to once again breathe on her own.

I took a two-hour walk outside this evening, and I was reminded of words to a song:
    
     He walks with me and He talks with me;
     And, He tells me I am His own.
     And the joy we share as we tarry there,
     None other has ever known.

Though I walked out the door by myself, I was not alone.

"In the multitude of my anxieties within me, (Jesus') comforts delight my soul."
     - Psalm 94: 19

"Truly, my soul silently waits for God."
     - Psalm 62: 1

"Grandchildren are the crown of the aged."
     - Proverbs 17: 6

... Lindsey is indeed my crown - but, she is the princess.

Our Princess - Lindsey Brooke Bowser

Lindsey Brooke Bowser is our precious 7 year old granddaughter. 

She is also a Princess - our Princess!

Princess Lindsey has Tay Sachs Disease.  Tay Sachs is a fatal genetic disorder that results in progressive destruction of the nervous system.  It is caused by the absence of a vital enzyme called hexosaminidase-A (hex-A).  Without hex-A, a fatty substance called GM2 ganglioside accumulates abnormally in cells, especially in nerve cells of the brain.  This ongoing accumulation causes progressive damage to the cells.  Over time, and in addition to recurrent/frequent seizures, the child becomes blind, cognitively impaired, paralyzed, and non-responsive.

Princess Lindsey has been in the Pediatric ICU of Mission Hospital in Asheville, North Carolina since Friday night, June 18th, when she lost her ability to breathe and her heart failed her.  Her life was saved due to the quick response of her sweet mother, Erin.  At the time of this writing, Lindsey remains on a ventilator, and is getting IV antibiotics as well as dopamine and epinephrine.

Your prayers for our Princess are greatly appreciated.  Please continue to pray for Lindsey, and her mom and dad (Erin and Dan), and for all of us who love her so much.